Countdown...

3 more days till it starts...sigh...stress stress stress....and with such gloomy weather i doesnt help at all...crap...

Sick...

The cause and effect of being stress for exam is being sick...and additional for me...i've return to my Msian timing...yeah...i now sleep around 3am and wakes up at 12pm....which is around Msia's 12am n 9am. And thanks to the stress i'm sick somehow for a moment everyday....with the sneezing and drools from the nose in the afternoon. Just hope this ends quickly....

Compilation...

it has been many days now that i cant seem to get this post typed out properly....seriously, for the pass days since my last post, i've been thinking of posting things here and yet i was unable coz of the things happen around me. Even now i struggle to type this, to type this into proper sentencing and something that makes sense. Reason??...too many things on my mind...

Where to start and how....well i guess it all started when me wanting to go back for my holiday became a serious issue. parents want me to stay and work....while me wan to go back coz i dun really like it here with my current situation. Rite here i feel so much retriction where i got to act according to the rules etc etc which makes me feel not myself. Worst part of it...in the midst of this ia made my mom cry...and i concluded to give up on that thought of going back. Yet as the days pass i feel more miserable coz i know i'm forcing myself to stay where i am to be at.

things has been told to me on wat i can do here and yet i dun accept it coz i feel it is different and there are more retrictions to it. And it is a contradicting thing when at one point i was ask not to go back to save money and yet i was told to stay here and spend more money...dun u think it is a contradicting thing?? i was ask for reasons to go back too...and of course i had mine and yet i wouldnt tell coz i know it wont make a difference..it has always been like this since young...always tricking me to tell them y and yet always breaking the promise so i never tell y in the end. Arghhhh....and yet i'm still here thinking of ways to go back..crap.

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I was reading my old blog...haha and i find it funny when i read it. Not cause it is really funny though there is some that r funny. It is cause i find it the way i used to type, gave me an impression of a naive, inmature complaining idiot. Seriously i laugh and smile at the posts i typed there. Well i dunno whether i'm still the same here but then either way it means something good. If i've changed....means i've grown..haha...if not means i'm staying true to myself=P But then i like the way i used to typed it out...coz it reminds me of the things i've done back then. And i'm happy about it though there was those sad and frustrating post, it still reminds me of the experince that i've gone thru.

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I was thinking about a topic jess blog about and that makes me lazy to blog it again...go read off her's if u wanna read...haha...which topic is it...u figure it out lar...just darn no mood rite now=P

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Man....so many things and yet i manage to post these...crap...and this is heading no where...i shall end here...

Preparations...

Brain cells!!...Check!!
Notes!!...Check!!
Books!!...Check!!
Stationaries!!...Check!!
Discispline!!...Not checkT_T

Arghh....2 more weeks and the battle will began(if u r wondering wat it is....it is exam) To me every exam is like a battle/war, we make preparations everytime before the exam till we go ignoring our meals, sleeps, and at times the people n things around us. I think is very similar to the soldiers out there, before war, they train, prapare for the war, ignoring everything just for the purpose to overcome the the enemy. Rite now i have everything checked...except my discipline to sit down somewhere n study for hours, it is just hard to do it when u dun hav anyone to study with(YinXie n Jeremy, if u 2 r reading this, i appreciate ur companies at McD those long nites). Anyway, i still got to smack my ass and stick it to the chair and sink my head into the books to study...it is a whole new level compare to back homeT_T

Chiller for the weekend...

Well i had a bad start for my weekend...which explains the no posts...and yesterday to get everything off me and to relax abit i went to the city to look for Jeremy. I did some useless get on n off the tram as i was not so sure about the roads in the city and in the end i realise is just a long straight road to read to his place.

Anyway, i drop by his place for a while before heading back into the city for a short walk, he brought me to eat nice egg tarts(yes they remind me of the egg tarts back home. thinking about it now makes me hungry=P) Then continue to walk around before we headed to Stalactites, a 24 hours Greek restaurant. Now since he has been there before so i ask him to make the orders and thinking that he is hungry too so ask him to order accordingly..and ended up with a large plate of meat of lamb n chicken, pure meat!! a plate of calamari and a bowl of fries. And thanks to my 'smart-ness' i didnt bring my camerea to take the picture of the food. Back to the story...as we were eating half way, he stopped and at first i thought that is just like a break taking things slow, but ended up it seems to be that he is full and there is more than half a plate of meat, calamari and fries to finish. So being the next big eater there...i have to clear it or it is a wastage, but in the end i manage to finish the calamari, and leaving 5% of meat and 70% of fries...and i was bloated there thanks to the meat.

later on we went to bowl, yeah finally i get to bowl since the last time i played like ages ago. And thanks to the promotion we took we manage to play 4 games in total=), at first we intent to get a jug of beer to drink but then it seems they needed approved id to allows to buy it...so we ended up getting 2 jugs of soft drinks. And i lost 3 games to Jeremy, manage to win 1 though, but the enjoying the nite and relax and of course the fellowship was the important thing for me there.=)

Wat can i do??...

Every now and then when someone does something that u in ur opinion is something not rite and yet u cant say it out or correct the person coz that person has the every rite to do that....you get that frus feeling in u, get wat i mean??...Well often i face that kind of situation and yet i never feel ease when that happens. Though that person has every rite to choose wat they wan to do but y do we or at elast feel this way??...well is just a conflict of opinions i would say. It is like 2 minds that has diff thoughts, one mind think way A is the rite while the other mind say way B is better, and when both doesnt agree with each other comes arguments etc etc...but some will choose to shut up and keep it coz of not wanting a argument. Then how do we overcome this then?? shout at each other till our ass falls off??, or should we just shut up and leave it?? i think we should sit down n talk properly in a calm n peaceful way. Will it work?? try it out n find out

Sinking into...

Books soon...sigh..exam is near by and i really need to download all the extra notes to study...first time exam here dun plan to fail...so prayers everyone and i need more self decipline and determination...being lazy recently...super lazy=P..

Same weight...

Finally there is a weighting machine...well everyone thinks that once u go overseas u will grow fatter coz of the food they eat...but for me...base on the weighting machine i still weight the same, which mean i've not gain any wieght means not fatter...but for some reason, mayb coz of the lack of walking compared to last time, my breathing has gotten worse after walking for sometime. Gotta take note of this health matter!

Till death do us part...

Ok..i'm not reciting a wedding vow to someone now...is just that when i woke up this morning and having my morning tea...this line came to me...and i was whoa...early in the morning and death came into ur mind. Anyway wat it mean in th vows was when the 2 get married the only way they will be apart will be death of one before another, but as in this modern age...anything is possible.

Well i type this out not to tell the whole world wat it meant, i think most of us know wat it meant. But i want to say is have u ever thought wat will u do if u know how many days left u have on this earth?? I think rich fellas will start worrying about thier will and settle everything they have and give accordingly to thier children etc etc. But for a normal person, the average income person wat will they do?? Spend all thier money so the will leave nothing on earth for no one?? Well everyone of us has a different opinion on that. Mine?? if i know how many days i have on this earth, and ASSUMING i will be in my working life with a family etc where everything is smooth. I would spend my last few days with my family, i think when u have a family of ur own they matter the most...going for trips around the world with my family if i have the cash, and even when i die...no burial needed, yeah though burial is a long lasting thing, but i dun fancy it(imagine having ur children etc to clean the grave every year - ching ming, though i dun do it but that sucks lar cleaning the grave) rather they have cremate my dead body and throw my ashes into the sea. Of course that is the future which that might not even happen to me. As for now if i know, i wont tell a single soul, i would just enjoy life just as it is.

That is just my thoughts...but in reality it will never happen, u must be some kind of psychic to be able to know when u r gonna die or so sick that the days are mention to u. But then again, if u knew the days u have left on this earth wat will u do?? And wat u do shows how much u fear death dun u think so??

X marks the spot...

X marks the spot...i think many of u know wat it means rite??...it means where the treasure is for the pirates...but then i would say our goal in life. Where is our goal in life??...where is the X pointing at...are we heading to our goal?? Well some may ask...wat is our goal in life...well that is for u to find out on ur own. In fact some of us knows our own goal in life but then always walking a whole other direction and never reaching the X. Are you gonna be one of them??...or do u wan to be a person who knows ur goal in life and want to reach ur goal?? U decide for urself, reflect on ur own.

Smile?!...

yeah i know this pic is small but then wat i wan to do rite now is to achieve that...to make u always smile...which i often fail. I like this pic, not coz only is cute u c...but also it gives me a goal to achieve....to make u smile always=)

Patience...

How much patience does a person has?? Everyone of us has a different level of patience, and do this pic, how many of u hav the patience to do it??....to slowly get the boxes in line small together n refined neat n close together and colour it that way without mistakes.

Anyway..back to the topic...patience. Wat good does patience do to us?? Well i dunno wat it does to everyone but for me, to be patient and not be anxious about things. Many things in life we expect to be done immdiately, and of course u know wat happen when it doesnt happen eh?? we get pissed off about it etc etc...but then i learn to be patient and not request so much, good things comes to those who wait eh?!...well wat good will it be i do not know but why rush in life??

Drawing...

Does anyone know where this pic is from??..haha..well, after so many years and yet i'm still keeping it. Well not drawned by me but by my fren who gave it to me when i'm still in primary. And if u look the real thing is kinda nice when it sketched out. I used to sketch when i was a small kid, over the years i lost that skill, yeah so rite now i cant sketch exactly a picture. But i still love drawing.

Staring at the moon...

Had dinner just now and on the way home saw the bright shinning round moon up in the sky. And during the whole ride back home i keep staring up into the moon for it is so beautiful, and then reminds me of one line that movies/ shows/ or watever that when someone says to anoter something about looking at the moon/stars(cant remember which) and the person's love is also looking up at that same moon/star that same time....which leads me to think...is that really happen in real life?? i mean in shows anything is possible...but how often in real life does it happen??...my thoughts...close to 0%

Change for the better...

Something i got out of the lecture i just had but not relating to the subject..haha. People always say make changes in our life for the better and when the changes has made we complain that the chnages has no effect, or doesnt work. One of the reason that i just realise during the lecture mention by the lecturer of course is that do we have the perseverance to wait for the changes to take effect and see the better side of it?? Many times we expect the changes to have an immediate effect which at times it does and it doesnt. When we doesnt we complain and seek for another change saying the changes that has been made is no good as no effect has been seen. Sometimes in life, the decisions we made might not have an immediate impact on our life, it might take a longer time for it to take effect. Conclusion??...dun complain when it seems there is nothing going on...but just persevere longer and there might be a difference...